Earlier today I saw a meme that stated in the world of so many Kim Kardashians, be a Diana. I got thinking….I really don’t want to be either of them. I want to be ME!
It has taken a long time for me to find myself. Growing up life was not all roses, being severely teased and picked on for 6 years between grades 3 and 8 didn’t help either. I would be bullied for what I was wearing, what I said in class (which wasn’t much), or the activities I did after school (for example Girl Guides, or ballet class, or swim lessons).
I was struggling to find myself, who I was. I did things to try and fit in. Yet it didn’t go too well. I would be laughed at even more. So I was so confused. My 12 yr old brain was thinking “Do what I want to do, get laughed at….try and fit in with peers, get laughed at…..” I did have a couple of outlets.
Going to Girl Guides, I excelled, I didn’t have to do math, or reading. It was all play, and experience based mostly. Being shown how to build a camp fire, or learning about the history of Girl Guides with stories, activities and discussions. Or there was ballet class, I could dance and feel free. Yes I as mentioned above I did get teased and bullied because of those things, however I was happy there. Below is a photo of myself working as a lifeguard at our Area Girl Guide Camp in Haliburton, Ontario (approx. 1995)
Where I was even more happy was in the water, taking swim lessons was always a highlight of my week. To the point where I did the extra lessons to become a life guard and swim instructor. I was proud of myself reaching that goal. The kids at school teased and said that I would never be a life guard, that I didn’t really know how to swim. Thinking back to a memory of when I first got to teach that I believe my parents came to the Open House at the pool. This was a night where families get to watch their daughter/son in lessons, and we also as teachers got to meet the families and talk for a moment. My parents came to the Open House. My supervisor asked my parents who were they watching, or who was their child. My parents said the teacher! I was happy there, excelling at something I liked and was good at.
As an adult now, I do my own thing, dance the beat of my own drum. I choose to be me. Yes I wear bold colours, and pattern. Some I’ve been told when they first saw me at a distance were afraid of me. I’m sorry that is the way you feel. I am who I am, me and my feathers. As one of my Marketing Business Guides Sally Hogshead said to me, it’s okay to be me. I have not looked back. Wearing feathers in my hair and dancing when ever there is music playing. I am me!
What are you doing in your own life to be you? Are you hiding? Or stepping up fully? Another of my Femtors Jo Dibblee says time and time again, it’s time to remove the frocks of our life.