Little Red Dress

group-christmas-formal-nov-1996-black-out-eyes

It was semi-formal night in Res.  Everyone was dressing up and looking amazing.  I went out and bought a new dress.  A little red dress.  Even in University I liked wearing colour.
“Aime come downstairs to the lounge, we’re doing photo’s.”  Dee was at my door.

“Derek, come downstairs to the lounge, we’re doing photo’s.”  Dee then went to Derek’s door.  He came popping out of his room, and to mine.   “Let’s go.  Boy do you look amazing.”  Derek stopped short, and pulled me into him, kissing me lightly this time.  “Wow, you are beautiful, look so beautiful in that dress.”  Shy smiling back at him “Thanks.  You look smart in your suit.”  I had not shown Derek the dress I was going to wear for the semi-formal.

It was fun doing the pictures, yet we didn’t do an ‘couple’ photo’s.  And that seemed okay with everyone.   The quick short walk over to the cafeteria was a cold one.  We were in Thunder Bay, Ontario after all.  Walking with Derek he held me close, and seemed to be watching the other male students as we walked past.  Not thinking much of it then, I was just happy to be with him, and friends going to enjoy a special dinner.

Sitting at the end of the table, I felt good, yet I kept wondering about Derek.

“Derek, are you okay?”  Derek huffed as we walked back to the dorms.  The night air caught my breath, and I gasped as I was walking.  It was cold!

“I don’t like the other men looking at you in the dress.  You’re my girl.  All mine.  Not theirs.”  I walked in silence back to the dorm, with him.  I didn’t know if this was a good thing, or bad thing.

Christmas came and went, being home was fun.  Seeing friends, and also seeing Derek as well over the holiday.  My parents liked Derek I think.  He got along with everyone well.  As soon as the break started it was over and  I was back in Thunder Bay for school again.

“I have Scottish, and Irish blood in me.  I have a temper.  I’m keeping it at bay right now, but I don’t know when it’ll lash out physically.”  Derek said to me after Christmas one day.  He was getting upset at himself and me, as he had been pressuring me to have sex, and I didn’t want too.  I remembered one of the girls in the house that was a few years older than me that I started talking to about being in this relationship with Derek.  She said to me “Aime be selfish, if you don’t want to do something that makes you uncomfortable then don’t!”  So I stuck to my gut and kept saying no to Derek.  After Derek said lashing out, I moved away from him, we were just sitting on my bed talking.  I was starting to become afraid of him.  Yet didn’t know what do to, or how to get out of it.  I still loved him, I think.

What happened in the following months, I had no idea was coming…and it would be a very long time until I could wear a little red dress.

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